Standing in the broken spotlight
Searching for the pain.
Years of endless heartache
Driving me insane ~what's sane?
The chairs lay in pieces
Across the ruins of my mind
Shards of glass scattered on the dusty floor
Tell the tales of time. ~I wanted you
Where is the laughter
That echoed in these walls
Feelings that stirred in me after
Hearing your haunting call ~Farewell
Memories of youth carried on the wind
Blow through this tortured place
In the ashes on overturned tables
I see images of your face ~So handsome
The applause you generously gave me
For performances that were encored
Wincing through dusty lunar rays
Waiting for you to walk in the door ~Your gone
My heart is dripping blood
For a love I refused to be
Never really noticing you were my audience
I was too caught up in me ~Too late
Dozens of dead roses thickly carpet
This stage that is my life
Seems like the only one who remains
Is me and this beautiful grasped knife ~So cold
I created this illusion
I've always been alone
Even in oceans of adoring fans
Knowing love of what I was shown ~I didn't take notes
Braving constant solitude
I thought it made me strong
But when the time came to step down
I searched but you were gone ~Did you say good-bye?
My ego was my prison
I seductively shut myself in
I raise the dagger to my bosom
To live will be a sin ~I am guilty
I hold it in position
Ready for the thrust
I look once more to see if you're there
Then I give in to steel lust ~It hurts
I collapse on my splintered world
Just as my head begins to wake
Life fluid tainting regret
I want to finally love you, too late ~Damn
I reach my hand out
Wanting fading breath
I was pained for hurting you
Then sentenced myself to death ~I am a fool

November 13th 1999 Dawn