Rawks! \m/ >.< \m/

I hate writing my reviews on films because each time I do, I feel like I’m giving away spoilers in which the viewer should approach the film with as much as a blank slate as I had.

From the opening with Metallica churning out “For Whom the Bell Tolls” and ending it with Jack White in the Raconteurs with “Solute Your Solution”, this was a complete gore fest thrill ride!

It starts out with Columbus Ohio (you don’t give your real name so that you can avoid getting attached to the person). Columbus [played by Jesse Eisenberg] found himself during the virus outbreak at college in Texas. A loner, social recluse and geek– he wants to return to the only family he has, his parents who live in Ohio. Romantically doomed from the beginning, his first experience with a girl wound up being his first time coming into contact with a ‘zombie’. He only wishes to meet a girl who’s hair he can brush over her ear and introduce to his folks– or her folks, whichever are less dysfunctional. You note I put a ‘ in front and behind zombie… that’s because they aren’t the typical undead zombies that we’re accustomed to. The people, like most of the modern zombie type films, are infected with a maddening virus that winds up turning them into a walking, hungry corpse instead of the rising undead [which the latter are what the zombies in my progressing graphic novel are- true and pure zombies created by-- well, you'll just have to stay tuned].

On his way back “home” he runs into Tallahassee [Woody Harrelson] who is a rough and zombie smashing survivor en route to… Tallahassee. Only one thing keeps Tallahassee motivated, other than killing any zombie that gets in his way, is his second true love- Twinkies. The world seems to be out of the spongy golden goodness and he bent on getting to that creamy center.

Once Tallahassee picks up Columbus alongside the highway he agrees to take him as far as Texarkana, which is about as far as he feels he can stand him without wanting to bash his head in.

Columbus, from his survival success, has compiled a list for Zombie Survival– which we are taught along the way, and yes I took notes. We learn from him and we learn with him, especially when they run into a pair of sisters [played by Emma Stone and my favorite- Abigail Breslin] who are not what they appear.

From there the fun only begins. It was everything I thought it would be [that can be good or bad] with a few extra surprises thrown in.

This movie is nothing but campy fun and you shouldn’t expect any thing more. It’s a ‘B’ film on Code Red Mountain Dew; so put in the film, pop the popcorn and sit back for some gory fun.

**Warning– Gore**