Today was my first time out shopping this year. The first thing I noticed was the massive amount of people out and about. I made certain to steer clear from stores last weekend to avoid the crowds but apparently everyone had the same idea as me, “Save the trips until after the new year”. There were a ton of Christmas items for 75% off, but those aisles were barren wastelands with merchandise galore, but no people gawking and snatching the awesome deals I forced myself away from.
Back to the parking lot though… After looking at all the snarling drivers and people briskly walking through the lot, I stopped and smiled. My ears were delighted to NOT hear the sound of Salvation Army kettle bell ringer ambushing patrons as they tried to make their way in and out of the entrances. Silence is a beautiful thing.
After I finished my shopping (which I’m so proud of- no wine, no junk, no nada el zilcho of anything bad for me…) I went to pay and I was met by an apologetic customer who felt bad for her broom and mop taking up the entire conveyor belt. I shrugged at the inconvenience because it was no big deal (just next time you better watch it!). When I went to pay the cashier was extremely polite and personable. I didn’t think much of it except it made shopping a nice experience.
The next place I went to was GameStop to pick up one of their super cheap PS2 games. I was met by a friendly hello from the cashier across the room and ended the time there by another super friendly “Thank you, have a wonderful day.” This time I was a little taken back. Although the lady who checked me out is normally friendly, she’s usually friendly in a laid back kind of cool way. This greeting was more Stepford. I smiled a little confused, took my bag and wished her a wonderful day as well. I think it was the plastered smile and forced friendliness that caught me off guard.
My final stop before heading back home was KFC. I’ve been craving the mashed potatoes (shut up- I know it’s not exactly health food but I’m not judging me, neither should you). When I ordered I was shocked at how nice the girl sounded. She repeated the order back, got it correct, asked if I wanted anything else without sounding annoyed like she HAD to ask and didn’t push any other products on me. This is KFC, they’re normally a bunch of teeny boppers who act like their parents are punishing them by making them get a job (I’ve noticed that attitude with most places I venture in to shop). This time the scenario was quite different.
I went up to the window and the girl politely repeated the amount and took my VISA while smiling from her eyes and lips. She was also very Stepford-ish. Extremely polite in a very robotic “I’ve no soul, but I’m super duper happy” kind of way.
As I drove away from the little cluster of stores, I wondered if I should turn around and see if anyone needed assistance. I couldn’t help but think there was an overlord who had a death ray pointed at their families or favorite video game console. The baddie was waiting for the customers to clear out so they could take all the cash/special ingredients/cheat codes and vanquish the server if they made it known to anyone that their lives were in peril.
Since I had a new game to play, grocery food that needed refrigerated and hot food that needed to be ingested before it cooled down, I surmised that with the new year at hand, the only person perhaps observing these cashiers every move and forcing them to be sickeningly polite was perhaps management who additionally had their own overlord observing them.
If I’m wrong then I apologize for not going back and rescuing everyone when I had the chance. Cold food vs. human lives. It was a tough call.
